Man. Yesterday’s post really took it out of me. It’s not easy talking about my skivvies to the entire Internet. I could hardly sleep last night, knowing that the words “bikini” and “thong” were just… OUT THERE. Attached to MY HONORABLE NAME.
When it comes to entertainment value, anything that I say after yesterday’s post is only going to be a let down. Nothing humiliating, bawdy, or awkward has happened in the last 24 hours – and even though I never set out with this as a goal, it seems as though “humor trumps dignity” is becoming my new creed.
Here’s a question: is this a plus-size model?
I DIDN’T THINK SO EITHER. Sheesh, Macy’s. For crying out loud.
Here’s another question: do you call them clementines, cuties, or satsumas?
Speaking of clementines, in another life, I am going to name my children Clementine, Sparrow, and Bluebell. I can’t do it in THIS life, because what would people think? But deep down, I love these names. Maybe I should get some livestock – I could name a cow Bluebell, no questions asked. When it comes to bovines, you can get away with anything.
Just watch “Food, Inc.”
And… that’s all I’ve got today.