No rest for the weary

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I am having a hard time feeling like The Real Me right now, since The Real Me thrives on routine and nesting and eating the exact same thing for breakfast every morning.  But 2011 has offered no rest for the weary, and no predictability for your truly.

The past few months have been a rough go for The Real Me.

The Real Me likes walking 11 miles a night after work by herself.  The Real Me likes having all of her clothes hanging neatly in the closet.  The Real Me likes a balanced checkbook and a good night’s sleep.  The Real Me likes home-cooked meals.  The Real Me likes independence.  The Real Me likes quiet moments and clear skin and a big glass of water.  The Real Me likes to be home, wherever I have most recently dubbed it.

After weeks and weeks of travel, I am home today.  I am home tomorrow.

And then on Saturday, I am moving all of my stuff out of my home and into a storage unit, and becoming homeless – again.

It’s only for a season, and there are a lot of very good and valid reasons that I’m doing this.  It’s the right choice, and I have to remember that, like many of my seemingly manic decisions, I am, oddly enough, choosing it.

But The Real Me is just so damn tired, and hasn’t packed a thing, and will stay up all night tonight and tomorrow to pack my home away into boxes – boxes that I do not yet have.  The Real Me will cry and swear before it’s all over.  The Real Me will live uncomfortably, and pray that she doesn’t wither away in the midst of it all.

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8 Comments

  1. Jacque on March 24, 2011 at 8:59 AM

    My heart goes out to you. I know that pain. Praying for lots of grace for you.

  2. Ginger Ciminello on March 24, 2011 at 9:20 AM

    You will not wither, Annie Parsons. You will not fade away. Your roots will deepen and you will walk forward stronger than before. One box at a time… xo

  3. Katie on March 24, 2011 at 9:27 AM

    Oh, I know that feeling. Sending prayers your way. You can do this. xo

  4. Marijke on March 24, 2011 at 9:48 AM

    Come back to California! You can stay with me!!!

    Dig deep and rest, when and where you can. You are not alone…

  5. Terry McNichols on March 24, 2011 at 10:09 AM

    What? Tell us more? Did you get a shopping cart to push around the city and sleep under overpasses? What gives?

  6. Tad on March 24, 2011 at 3:42 PM

    I think it’s wise to remember what Bilbo Baggins wrote:

    All that is gold does not glitter. Not all who wander are lost. The old that is strong does not wither. Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

    From the ashes a fire shall be woken. From the shadows a light shall spring. Renewed shall be blade (life) that was broken. The crownless again shall be king (queen in your case).

    Yes. I’m a nerd.

  7. Anya Elise on March 24, 2011 at 3:54 PM

    Whenever I am feeling lost and in danger of fading away, I channel my inner-Rosie the Riveter: “We can do it!”

    You can do it. We all have the utmost faith in you.

  8. Monika on March 25, 2011 at 3:05 PM

    Go to the liquor store and get boxes. Go to the liquor store and get liquor.

    Hang in there. Transitions make us stronger and provide fodder for blog posts, after all.

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