Yeehaw, Fan Fair!


If you were to ask me what my idea of hell is, I would mention many things: citrus toothpaste. Windchimes and windsocks. Patent leather. Blisters. Cats.

But oddly enough, the two biggest components that make up my idea of hell probably aren’t too far off: huge crowds, and hot hot heat.

I experienced both this past weekend.

The CMA Music Festival, otherwise known as Fan Fair, hit the city of Nashville last Thursday, and plowed straight through until Sunday night. Four days of non-stop concerts, autograph lines, photo-ops, $7 Bud Lights, and me. With a 4-day pass. I somehow lived to tell the tale.

Put me in a stadium with 50,000 people, sweat beading on my forehead, and Bucky Covington taking the stage, and invariably, I’m going to be looking for something to distract me. I took to wandering, and created a little masterpiece to share with you the joys of Fan Fair.

Watching white people dance from Annie Parsons on Vimeo.

Don’t you feel like you were there? There were banana clips and bandanas, fanny packs and farmer tans. I two-stepped with cowboys, and made friends with Australians, and sweat (sweated? swat? swote?) at least 5 pounds off in my quest to find water. It truly could have been a miserable experience if I didn’t have such wonderful company along the way.

And if there was any doubt as to how hot it was, just check out my forehead.

By the end, I was done. No more Fan Fair. Give me AC. Give me water. Give me a shower. And give me a long, long time to sleep.


tags: | | | |


  1. Case and Los on June 11, 2008 at 11:07 AM

    You should become a video producer- so funny! Tell that guy to keep the shirt ON! Oh my gosh, this makes me fired up to move to the south. Or not. What will I do there? Probably make videos like you… btw, when are you and Miranda and Steph coming to visit us?! You need to start planning, we’ll be there in 4 mos. Right in time for the NKOTB concert. Booyah.;)

  2. Greta on June 11, 2008 at 1:20 PM


    I am in France. And damn it, IT IS EVEN RAINING IN FRANCE. It was overcast in Vancouver, B.C., London, and now here too. Convinced that you are the only one getting such sunshine. Let’s give and take a little, shall we?


  3. marijkejane on June 11, 2008 at 2:57 PM

    What is it that you all are wearing?? My simple Alaskan brain cannot comprehend the idea of tank tops WITHOUT A JACKET.


  4. Annie on June 11, 2008 at 4:22 PM

    Next year. Take me with you. Please.

  5. MB on June 12, 2008 at 8:48 AM

    This made me laugh, and then groan. Growing up in Oklahoma I know heat and humidity, but guys should still never wear sleeveless shirts. Ever. Ever. Ever. I mean, how much cooler are you actually by losing 3 inches of sleeve?!? I guess if you have a cool tat of Superman strangling terrorists with an American flag or something I could see the need. Maybe if I had “guns” to show off I’d feel differently, but I doubt it.

  6. Sarah on June 12, 2008 at 2:47 PM

    that video just made my day.
    i thought it was as good as it could get when we see the guy in the tank top with the loooow armholes. Do they sell them that way or is it just hours of tugging and sweating?
    but then in a gesture of selfless patriotism that flag shirt goes from being a mere chest covering to being a symbol of freedom? well i choked up a bit.

  7. Mazz on June 13, 2008 at 1:22 PM

    wow. i live a very sheltered, west coast, left coast life. apparently i am unaware of a major subculture.

  8. Annie Parsons on June 13, 2008 at 1:48 PM

    Bryan, this is no subculture, my friend. This is the heartland of America. This IS the culture. :)

Leave a Comment