Friends old and new

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My friend Matt is in his second year at Princeton Theological Seminary in New Jersey, and the other day, he emailed me saying, “I miss Seattle more and more. Yet, sadly, it’s becoming more of a memory than an old reality.” What an unfortunate truth – and one that has been sneaking into my own way of thinking in recent days. Seattle will always, always be home. But all of a sudden, it feels further away. I hear about the things that my friends are doing, and the new people that they have met, and I see pictures of them having fun in my favorite places, and it all just feels so… far.

I know that my friends will always be my friends. But space changes things. Distance changes things. Time pulls certain people and circumstances away, away, away, like taffy – and the longer we try to hold on, the more stretched we become.

But when we learn to let go – when we choose to let go – we find other hands to hold. They are not replacements. They are not the same. But they are wonderful and beautiful in their own unique ways – ways that no one else could be – and they are walking a parallel path to mine in this new chapter. I have found some of these people, and I am so grateful. And as my friend Emily mused about her own life in a recent email, “I don’t want to miss this good season because of selfishness or envy.” Me neither.

My friend Joel wrote to me, “I think that if you take steps, at every opportunity, towards your dreams, you generally find that somewhere along the way, you’re actually living the dream.” All of the little steps that I have taken since leaving Seattle have led me to where I am now – 10 months into a new life in Nashville, new relationships, a new perspective. I am not the same girl that I was when I arrived – this time has changed me. I have seen sides of myself that I never knew existed – and some that I would never care to see again. I have doubted and despaired, and I have lived and laughed. Many, many times, I have cried – and I know that I will cry again.

But today – beautiful today – the tears are nowhere to be seen. And today, I feel like I am living the dream. So take it from me. If you are thinking of making a life change or taking the plunge or chasing a dream, do it. It’s never easy. But it’s always worth it.

And my new friends are making this whole thing so much more fun.

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10 Comments

  1. Kyla Joy on October 30, 2008 at 9:03 AM

    Well said, my friend. I had no idea that I’ve lived here 2 months longer than you have. I thought you had been here longer, because you have done a great job at getting to know so many people. Yes, it’s so difficult to let go, but I am encouraged in knowing that the relationships are still there. They just look a little different….

  2. anna on October 30, 2008 at 11:01 AM

    i needed to read this today. thanks again, annie. :)

  3. The Mangerchine's on October 30, 2008 at 11:54 AM

    Lately I’ve been at a place where my attention has been focused on not looking ahead, not looking back and trying not to get caught up in being busy, rushing from one moment and experience to the next… but to fully enjoy each moment and experience and everything associated with it; what are we wearing, what are we eating, what are the smells, sounds, etc. I want to be completely present, and not look back later with regrets, fuzzy memories, or missed opportunities, I want to know that I relished in each moment and seized each opportunity.

    I love this post, I needed it about a year ago when I went through a major transition in friends as our lives took us apart, but the Lord has replaced those who have faded with new relationships and it has been awesome!

    Shannon

  4. The Mangerchine's on October 30, 2008 at 11:54 AM

    Lately I’ve been at a place where my attention has been focused on not looking ahead, not looking back and trying not to get caught up in being busy, rushing from one moment and experience to the next… but to fully enjoy each moment and experience and everything associated with it; what are we wearing, what are we eating, what are the smells, sounds, etc. I want to be completely present, and not look back later with regrets, fuzzy memories, or missed opportunities, I want to know that I relished in each moment and seized each opportunity.

    I love this post, I needed it about a year ago when I went through a major transition in friends as our lives took us apart, but the Lord has replaced those who have faded with new relationships and it has been awesome!

    Shannon

  5. bec on October 30, 2008 at 2:39 PM

    I feel that exact same way about Colorado. SAD.

    But you’re right, things have gotten better over time. And who knows where I’ll even be in 6 months.

  6. Greta on October 30, 2008 at 3:45 PM

    You are not allowed to stretch like taffy away from me.

    Thank you very much.

  7. Annie Parsons on October 30, 2008 at 3:47 PM

    Greta:
    Superglued. Forevah.

  8. Kelvin on October 30, 2008 at 8:51 PM

    I’ve read your blog by chance,your essay really knocks me out. Thanks Annie,:-)

    A friend from China: Kelvin

  9. AnnieBlogs on October 30, 2008 at 10:09 PM

    I appreciate you mucho. And I will prove it by having you accompany us to Marche on Sunday morning and hanging out with my parents. And letting Dad buy us breakfast.

    You are the best, Annie, and you have made my life in Nashville SO GREAT. Seriously.

    Ok, enough mushy. Ick.

    Word verification: wellbgr.
    “Well, beggar.”

  10. MB on October 31, 2008 at 7:44 AM

    Sometimes I feel like I’m stuck between letting go of old friends and looking for new ones. I put so much time and effort into what I do at school that I don’t have much left to invest in new friendships; I barely have enough left to maintain the few meaningful relationships I have. Hmmmmmm.

    That sounds way more depressing than I meant it to.

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