Input, output / What goes in is what comes out

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Sometimes I wonder if this blog gets the best of me – the best of my creativity, the best of my concentration, the best of my time and efforts. I have been posting nearly every day for a long time now, and I have occasionally greeted the computer screen with nothing to say, and after wracking my brain, have come up with something banal at best. No one should have to read about the weather (even though I write about it), what I’m doing at my desk (even though I show you), or what I dreamed about the night before (even though… no, never mind, still not interesting).

I recently told my mom that I am consciously making the decision to not feel guilty about my lack of prolificacy when it comes to songwriting – there is enough that I already feel an unnecessary amount of guilt about in my life, so why add to the heap? Unlike many Nashville songwriters, I write simply when something hits me – it could be weekly, it could be monthly, it could be seasonally. Writing this way might never make me any money, and might not lead to a “career” as a songwriter, but I think it will lead to an overall enjoyment of the craft.

The same needs to go for this site. My routine of posting every morning, Monday through Friday, has been a good practice in writing for me. But I need to not feel guilty if I don’t have something to say, something to post. Before I can produce, I need to consume – through reading, and thinking, and observing, and mulling things over. I need to interact with people (real humans), and go running, and listen, and nest, and camp in the rain (this Friday night’s event, God help me). I need to spend time living in order to find things to write about.

So in the coming days and weeks, I might not post as regularly. Or maybe I will – I don’t know. I suppose I’m just giving myself permission to let the thoughts ebb and flow, and to hold off until the light goes on.

Or to wait until I get a text message like the one I got this morning:

Today I get to eat gator-on-a-stick and see the smallest girl in the world. Jealous?

Because THAT is something worth sharing.

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10 Comments

  1. wrecklessgirl on October 22, 2008 at 2:30 PM

    annie, that was the best thing ever…the video rocked my world. you are the best.

  2. wrecklessgirl on October 22, 2008 at 2:31 PM

    i mean, the one below this post.
    is the best.
    i mean, this post isn’t half bad either, but i’m finding it hard to relate to you today (hey! that’s a first!!!) since i don’t have issues writing songs monthly or weekly…i don’t write songs with words. but i do write songs. just not down on paper, so i forget them as soon as i get off of the piano bench. wait…maybe i can relate….

    CRAP! it’s not a first!!!

  3. Jodie on October 22, 2008 at 2:31 PM

    I love this statement: “Before I can produce, I need to consume – through reading, and thinking, and observing, and mulling things over.” I can only say, true dat. I feel exactly the same way. One of my greatest fears is that my blog might become boring – like my posts may become lifeless and I’ll just start to read like I talk – which is seriously mediocre. I love your blog though. And good for you for giving yourself permission to live somewhere else. :)

  4. Angela Hart on October 22, 2008 at 11:21 PM

    Annie,

    Don’t fret, your text message is blog worthy. Hysterical! (And why does it make me feel jealous?)

  5. Sarah Kate on October 23, 2008 at 12:23 AM

    I must know. Who was going to eat gator on a stick and see the smallest girl in the world? As a life-long resident of the south, I’m pretty sure I’ve been to a place where both of those can occur, simultaneously. I must know where this magic heaven-of-a-place is.

  6. erin on October 23, 2008 at 5:55 AM

    is that your gentle, subtle way of saying “it’s not you it’s me.” Because, i must admit…I feel a slight pain in my heart. But if you love something let it go, right??? Fine annie. JUST GO. I guess i will have to find other ways to procrastinate. And i suppose that means I will just have to start calling you more often and catch up like real friends are supposed to do. On second thought, that might not be a bad idea. Expect one tonight.

  7. erin on October 23, 2008 at 5:56 AM

    and what’s with this new pop-up word verification. That means i can’t read it before i post so i can talk about it! That last one was froto…it totally deserved some cred.

  8. The Mangerchine's on October 23, 2008 at 8:26 AM

    enjoy your freedom to live, explore, and observe. i can’t wait to read about the adventures that you have as you relay them back to us!

    shannon

  9. The Mangerchine's on October 23, 2008 at 8:26 AM

    enjoy your freedom to live, explore, and observe. i can’t wait to read about the adventures that you have as you relay them back to us!

    shannon

  10. Marijke on November 5, 2008 at 12:42 PM

    Your blog is like my morning coffee. Things just aren’t the same without it…

    BUT. I respect you and your need not to need to post.

    Like Today.

    November 5th.
    The day without coffee.

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