Nicked floor (in the nick of time)

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So there I was, cutting apart the Costco salmon fillet that I had just taken out of the oven.

When I came back from Kansas City at Christmas, my mom took 6 individually vacuum-packed frozen fish and stashed them in various corners of my suitcase – and these precious little gems have been carefully rationed for the past 3 months. This was my last one. I had already prepared a fresh, leafy, green salad, and was slicing up the salmon to crown the top.

Unfortunately, I was feeling a little loosy-goosy.

And before I knew it, the knife FLIPPED out of my hand, cart-wheeled through the air in the most rapid slow-motion known to man – and, with the speed of a feline (and the instinct of a genius), I jumped sideways, flinging my legs and arms wide.

Jesus loves me, this I know:

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The knife – BOOOOOING – landed tip-first in the hardwood floor. RIGHT WHERE MY FOOT HAD BEEN ONE SECOND EARLIER.

Good thing Mel was right there, always prepared with her camera. I did not move. This was the moment, LIVE.

Oh my word, I need medical insurance.

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10 Comments

  1. Greta on March 24, 2009 at 8:46 AM

    Ha ha! I wondered if you had set up a dramatic reenactment until you clarified that Mel was at the ready with her flash-click. :)

    No kidding about the insurance. You and me both.

  2. Crystal on March 24, 2009 at 10:43 AM

    I’m glad that you’re ok. But on a lighter note, your legs look great in those jeans!

  3. Mary on March 24, 2009 at 11:27 AM

    Uh Crystal, DITTO ON THE JEANS.

    MHFA (my hot friend Annie), you are a [hilarious] GEM. It’s times like these you should be grateful for roommates – what if I filleted my OWN FOOT, as you almost did? Who would take me [single and bleeding] to the hospital? And more importantly, who would document said event?!

    xx

  4. Tad on March 24, 2009 at 12:10 PM

    With reflexes like that you and Mel should tour as a knife-throwing act. You’ll be rich and famous! You can write songs about having knives thown at you and the wierd people you meet on the road.

  5. becca on March 24, 2009 at 5:32 PM

    hopefully your landlord reads your blog.

  6. Andrea on March 24, 2009 at 6:55 PM

    Yikes! That is a sharp knife. Glad you are safe. ;)

  7. Marcia on March 24, 2009 at 11:20 PM

    I think you had an extra angel around you at that moment…. holy cow!! I’m SO glad you still have both of your feet. :-)

  8. Little AP on March 25, 2009 at 11:28 AM

    Kudos to the fast-clicking Mel! I had also wondered if you had a)reenacted the scene or b)stayed in that position while someone got a camera. Wow. Glad you have no puncture wounds on the gorgeous-red-painted-toenails (or toes. Or any other part of the foot, for that matter.)

    Much love,
    Little AP

  9. Mom on March 25, 2009 at 2:34 PM

    People are commenting on your legs, your painted toes – can I just say…”the FLOORS! I wish my hardwoods looked that good!”
    mom

  10. […] how my mom is especially fond of sending me away with a suitcase of frozen food?  This time, it was a pork tenderloin – a large, cylindrical, vacuum-sealed piece of meat.  I […]

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