Why commitment equals freedom
Something really remarkable has happened: I’ve stopped thinking about moving.
I know that this is probably foreign to some people, but I have entertained the idea of moving – no matter where I’ve lived – for at least the past 5 years. When I was living in Seattle, I was thinking about moving to Nashville. When I was living in Nashville, I was thinking about moving back to Seattle. Then, in December of 2009, family circumstances took me to Denver – and every day, I was thinking about moving back to Nashville, or back to Seattle, or maybe to Portland, or there’s always Boston…
But I have not thought about moving since November. For over two months, it hasn’t crossed my mind. I live in Denver, and I’m not looking to leave anytime soon.
My new job commits me to this city. And for as backward as it sounds, commitment equals freedom. I am free from the questions, from the what ifs, from the grass-is-greener thoughts that accompanied having options. Having options creates the illusion that one can do anything – which, while attractive in theory, can be alarmingly paralyzing.
There is something really good about having fewer options. Having fewer options simplifies my thought life, and allows me to be present exactly where I am. Having fewer options makes me say “yes” to all that’s right in front of me. Having fewer options frees up my calendar, my bank account, and my heart.
Having fewer options actually gains us access to a wealth of experiences, relationships, and resources that are far from pipe dreams – no, in fact, they’re close enough to touch.
If you find yourself having your options whittled down, don’t freak out. It might be the greatest thing that could happen.