K is for Kaleidoscope

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We come into this world vessels of beauty, pre-packed with purpose and potential. We are full of hope, full of possibility. But eventually, the various shapes and colors inside of us begin to shake around like a jigsaw puzzle, rattling our brains, and we long to make sense of the chaos. So we begin to unpack the contents of our hearts.

A green triangle. A red square. A yellow diamond.

We spread them out on the kitchen table, and attempt to arrange a mosaic that makes sense – pairing pieces together, turning them this way and that, feeling frustration at the bits that just don’t seem to fit. We focus on individual colors, scrutinizing and criticizing them for being purple, for being orange – for being exactly what they were meant to be. We want the shapes to combine and form a flower, a mountain, a rainbow – but no matter how hard we try, we cannot arrange them into something lovely. Our attempts yield us with nothing but a dull and flat sprawl of plastic chips and pebbles. And so we hang our heads.

We are disappointed and disheartened. Our high hopes have crashed. We believe that we will never achieve anything worth noticing. We have tried, but cannot come up with a lovely or worthwhile picture.

So we scoop up the pieces, and pour them back into the can.

But sometimes, our resignation is the opportunity for someone else to get a hold of us. Someone who made all of the colors, and the vessel that holds them. Someone who knows that the value is not in the doing, but in the simplicity of being. Someone who understood that life would be ever-shifting, but, wonder of wonders, designed us for beauty even when turned upside down – tumbling masterpieces.

All I must do is hold my face to the light, and turn.

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12 Comments

  1. Valerie on October 6, 2008 at 9:55 AM

    This is beautiful. I have chills right now, no joke. Thank you for writing this.

  2. erin on October 6, 2008 at 10:04 AM

    thank you, AP. thank you. you are beautiful.

  3. kateanon on October 6, 2008 at 10:26 AM

    such a moving post, thank you

  4. anna on October 6, 2008 at 10:44 AM

    thank you, annie. you’re a gem.

  5. breepick on October 6, 2008 at 2:08 PM

    What an amazing post. Thank you so much, Annie.

  6. jnt. on October 6, 2008 at 6:39 PM

    you are so creative. i love the way you describe life. if you wrote a book, i’d buy it. so glad i found your blog.

  7. Greta on October 6, 2008 at 7:46 PM

    Oh my gosh Annie.

    WOW.

    This one is special. I’m going to ask for this one later on. Keep it flagged. It’s BEAUTIFUL.

  8. Lyla on October 6, 2008 at 9:00 PM

    Multiple people have already said it, but what a beautiful post. You are such a wonderful person.

  9. Tim and Krysten on October 7, 2008 at 2:19 AM

    Beautiful. You have captured an artist’s heart.

  10. Jen on October 12, 2008 at 9:28 PM

    This is gorgeous. I accidentally came upon your blog tonite and have been just taking it all in. Thanks for sharing your thoughts- I look forward to coming back often.

  11. brooke on October 14, 2008 at 7:33 PM

    So beautiful. I wandered into your blog the other day and am so glad that I did!

  12. […] bouquet of gorgeous peonies, and they’re sitting in my living room next to the stained glass kaleidoscope that my aunt made years […]

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