V is for Vacate, and Vote
Tonight, I am moving out of my sweet little Music Row apartment – the one that has held me for my first year in Nashville. When I moved in, I had a chair and a dresser; I slept on the hardwood floor in a sleeping bag, and drank my morning coffee wrapped in a blanket on a tiny rug I bought at T.J. Maxx. I cried a lot of nights, I cried a lot of mornings – and I stole an internet signal from the neighbors to frantically reach out to my far-away friends, desperate for any kind of connection. I was jobless, and relatively friendless, and in my most honest moments, absolutely hopeless.
I now look back on that time with nostalgia and sentimentality – those first few months were some of the most emotionally raw and honest I have ever experienced – but the truth of the matter is, I was terrified. I have never felt so alone. Every part of me wanted to run away – to go back to Seattle where I would be safe and loved.
Last night, as I looked around the now fully-furnished living room, piled high with boxes, my heart snuck up into my throat. I’m leaving what has become my HOME – the place where Christina sent a housewarming gift of stemless wine glasses, and then came to use them in person. The place where Greta and I got ready for the Opry, and talked until I cried. The place where I wrote some songs, and got brave enough to share them. The place where Mary and I were evangelized to by a homeless man. The place where Miranda and I accidentally split an entire jumbo bottle of chardonnay. The place where I baked for the ex-cons across the street. The place where my mom and I rehearsed for one of my shows. The place where Julie and I talked about breakups, and Miranda and I talked about breakups, and Meg and I talked about breakups. The place where I cut off my hair, and felt awesome… and then felt remorse. The place where Paul and Josh and I played Scrabble at 1am on Halloween. The place where Annie picked me up for the 5K. The place where my dad hung curtain rods, and the Handy Graham hung pictures. The place where I killed cockroaches. The place where the inaugural Running Club was held. The place where I realized that it’s a good thing that I moved to Nashville. The place where I realized that I’m pretty happy.
The place where I realized that God can take anything – an empty apartment, a broken heart, a lonely soul – and fill it to overflowing.
Tonight, a handful of friends will show up at my door, grab my boxes and bags and couch and bed and table and chairs, and move me to a new house – a house with two roommates and a front porch swing and a back deck and a fireplace. I could not be more thrilled – to be moving in with Julie and Melissa. To actually have furniture to be moved. To know friends who are so willing to help.
God is faithful. Here’s to signing on for another year of the Nashville unknown.
– – – – – – – –
And now, for a VOTE.
My new bathroom is painted my least favorite color in the universe… baby blue. Not a warm, robin egg blue… but cold and sharp. I have two options: take the time and effort to paint the walls a more neutral color so I can still use my terracotta paisley shower curtain, or to buy a new, somewhat-tolerable shower curtain that will match the color of my anti-dreams.
The walls would be tricky to paint – weird angles and a large possibility of drippage. It’s possible that I could find a shower curtain that I would like – I’m a big fan of turquoise, or brown, or the right shade of green. But it would have to be a good enough shower curtain to distract from the heinous color of the walls.
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you could always make the Handy Graham do the painting for you! :) I almost missed the vote on your post, had it not been for your FB status. I clicked on one of your links and got lost in old wonderings of yours. You used to have long hair! Your parents drove 9 hours to set up your apartment! You got hit on by the jerks at the Bluebird! Thanks for letting me into a little bit of the life of Annie Parsons. Not only did it give me something to do for the last hour, but it made me love you even more. Hugs. Merry Christmas!
Try out the baby blue w/a new shower curtain. If said shower curtain doesn’t satisfactorily distract but the baby blue, then get busy painting!
I think painting it would make you happier in the long run. Plus, I love your shower curtain and shopping for one of those is not fun. At least it wasn’t for me.
Could the distaste for Baby Blue be lessened by a fabulous contrasting color? Something unexpected and dramatic? Red perhaps? Or Plum? Or even persimmon?
Painting is hard work, but having a fabulous room does wonders for mental space.
I agree with Sarah, if you can work with it to love it, so be it. Paint it if you can’t.
You know what this means right??
THAT I HAVE TO COME AND VISIT YOU IN YOUR NEW HOUSE. I am going to make it my life’s goal to visit you in each place you live from now until I die. That last part is morbid, but I have to have SOMETHING to live for these days right?
(and, yes, I am very YELL-y today)
I totally want to paint my bathroom right now… still trying to convince L.D. (Landlord Dude). I want to make the walls a deep chocolate brown.
I’m willing to help paint if you go that way – I’m good with trim and tight corners. I’m all about using an artist brush to get it just right!
I’d say you seal the deal with Debbie. Anyone willing to help paint is a friend for life. If you decide to try for the shower curtain without painting, then, Debbie, we will welcome you with your artist’s brush, in KC anytime!
mom
I’m so excited for you! And hoping against all hope that things will pan out just as easily for me in the next few months.
Looks like both Annies (and an Allie) are going through some major changes…
Brace yourself 2009… we’re comin’ with guns a blazin’!!! (Whatever that means)
Looks like it’s time to paint!
you know how I feel about baby blue…ick.
Totally make Graham paint it. I’ll even chip in a few bucks so that you don’t have to do that.
I love you and I don’t think we can even FATHOM the good times that await us in 09. Nashville is good to us, but God is better.
stop.
just shut up.
you had me at
“robin egg blue”…
you had me at
“robin egg blue”
I think I’m biased because my little bathroom was such a blue, and I couldn’t stand it. I painted it a warm green from Restoration Hardware and it makes all the difference — I love it and feel so at home when I’m in it!
At the same time, if it’s really difficult to paint, a nice chocolate brown curtain could probably distract well, and even make the blue enjoyable! Brown accenting always helps everything. :)
Post pictures of whatever you do!
Annie,
Just reading over your blog and I love this entry. It reminds me of my early days in Nashvegas, age 18, breaking up with a boy for whom I MOVED to Nashvegas. (Moved across the country in our mutual decision to “be together” and had an 8-month tenure in our finally-living-in-the- same-town romance. Nice.) Um-teen years later, well, here I am. And now it’s all part of the tapestry. I love that you’ve marked your first apt. with some beautiful words and need to read your blog more because I always light up when I do. Merry Christmas Seattle, Nashville, Tassel Man, Internet friend ~ Angela