Because I feel like a pad of butter?
When I moved into my apartment back in February, my dear friend Sarah offered me her bed on a long-term loan. It’s a great 4-poster, and has served me well. However, since Sarah is moving to Texas next month, she recently informed me that she’s going to need the bed back.
Never fear, Mary says. Just get this.
My favorite line: “This piece of toast is made of plastic, not bread, so if you wake up and smell burning toast, you are probably just having a stroke.”