The daily

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Confession: I want to be awesome.

Fun.  Smart.  Witty.  Talented.  Cool.  Not necessarily “together,” but at least effortlessly disheveled.  Not necessarily “popular,” but at least able to be choosy.  Not necessarily “rich,” but…  Fine.  Sometimes I want to be rich.

But, you know, life can be boring.  Life can fly by without the luxury of those cute moments – the times where a surprise comment in the grocery makes you feel validated, or a silly joke makes you side-smile, or a flower growing out of a sidewalk crack makes you think about life and death and God and beauty.

Life doesn’t always afford us those cute moments.

And it’s not that it’s ugly and awful and torturous.  It’s just… daily.  And busy.  It doesn’t leave much room for the fabulous, as much as I would like for it to.  The busyness expands, and balloons, and bullies its way into every corner of our lives, and makes us feel ugly and tired and unfocused.

Sometimes, some days, the most excitement we have is killing a spider before it makes it under the couch.  Eyeliner is the only tool we have to feel any semblance of “pretty.”  We cling to the satisfaction of having paid our bills this month, because that’s just about the only accomplishment we can pinpoint.

Life can be so daily.  Life can leave us feeling un-awesome.

Even now, my temptation is to steer this post into some charming little twist, some cute phrase that will leave you all with a grin and a vision of me, “C’est la vie!” skipping off through a field to make daisy chains out of the weeds.

But the truth is that I’m sunburned and muscle-sore and fly-bitten, and a little bit cranky because I don’t think I got the recycling bin out to the curb on time this morning.  The Greebs tore apart my new box of Kleenex, and I returned a new purchase from Target because Dave Ramsey would have shame-shamed me.  I’m trying to figure out how to work in my workouts this week, and wishing for quick fixes and easy answers and smooth sailing.

In short, today, I’m not feeling that awesome.

But I’ve lived enough dramatic excitement to know that the quiet, daily, dare I say boring moments are to be blessed. I’ll live to see another fabulous day – but for now, it’s business as usual on a Monday.

I’m choosing to be thankful.

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8 Comments

  1. Katie on July 25, 2011 at 9:37 AM

    Oh, I needed this. I’ve definitely been there – and it’s tough to choose gratitude amid the daily grind. Thanks for the reminder, Annie.

  2. Greta on July 25, 2011 at 9:42 AM

    Richard (pastor at Bethany) said once, “No one just wakes up on top of a mountain. You start with an idea of where you want to go, and then it takes hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of steps to get there. And no step is significant. And every step is significant. They all are necessary.”

    I think I’ve told you that before.

    Wish I could call you but you’re just starting your Monday morning. Praying for you dear friend– we will talk SOON.

  3. Kerry on July 25, 2011 at 11:23 AM

    Just so you know… you are totally awesome! Regardless of how you feel, you ARE awesome! (And don’t ever forget it!) (Ask your mom to forgive me for taking over for her.)

  4. sarah on July 25, 2011 at 12:58 PM

    thanks for keeping it real, annie.

  5. Julie on July 25, 2011 at 1:30 PM

    Thank you, Annie.

  6. Alissa on July 25, 2011 at 2:30 PM

    I have to admit, I read this title and was REALLY hoping you had a classic Annie story that revolved around the campus newspaper at UW. Alas, a much more honest assessment – just what our lives truly are. And these “daily” days? They make miracles like Zion (and a newly adopted baby I just heard about this morning) all the sweeter! Because our un-awesome-ness can really see the difference in those miracles.

  7. Random Crazy « Denise Morris on July 25, 2011 at 3:38 PM

    […] Monday, you guys. I’m sorry about that. But I read a blog post today that reminded me that even boring moments are “to be blessed.” Bless God in […]

  8. Brian Vasey on July 25, 2011 at 11:42 PM

    It is messages like this that make me read your blog. There’s just nothing else like it. Encouragement. Depth. Wisdom. Humor. And prose that sings. Those are rare gifts. I hardly even know you (except for your awesome music). But thank you. You enrich the lives of your readers.

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