Heads and tails


For me, Nashville is a safe place to land. It’s a city that always welcomes me back and tells me that I belong.

After spending last week with friends, holding new babies and touring new homes, being surrounded by people who know me and accept me, talking about life, love, and other mysteries (not this), I found my heart creeping back to that place that it always goes: Do I want to move back?

But I know that the question is bigger than that. It always is. The real question is, Is my life what I hoped it would be?

And for the entire 17-hour drive back to Denver, Foxy curled up in a ball on the passenger seat, I turned that question over and over in my head, an existential coin toss.

I don’t live in Nashville – tails. But I do live in Denver – heads.

I don’t get to see these people on a regular basis – tails. But I do have them as friends forever – heads.

I’m not independently wealthy – tails. But I do have a job that, most days, I really love – heads.

I don’t have a guest room – tails. But I do have a charming little hut just big enough for my dog and me, with high ceilings and skylights and an interior brick wall and a gas stove and a clawfoot tub – heads.

I’m single – tails. But I am single – heads.

Sometimes we choose our circumstances, and sometimes they choose us, and sometimes the only choice we have is to choose them back.




  1. Andrea on May 28, 2014 at 12:16 PM

    You have a CLAW FOOT TUB?! Consider me jealous.

  2. lyndee on May 28, 2014 at 12:49 PM

    love it, annie.

  3. Maria on May 28, 2014 at 3:37 PM

    The worst thing about making decisions is that by saying yes to something we are saying no to a bunch of others. The best thing about making decisions is that we aren’t powerful enough to screw up God’s plan for us. :)

  4. Janelle from Canada on May 28, 2014 at 5:21 PM

    Oh girl… This is like scraping my soul with a cheese grater.

  5. Leigh Kramer on May 28, 2014 at 5:49 PM

    This makes me wish even more we’d been able to grab coffee while you were in town. Next time!

  6. mrs. chesney on May 28, 2014 at 6:31 PM

    love this.

  7. Laurissa on May 29, 2014 at 12:05 PM

    Your life seems very blessed- I am working on buying a house and getting a dog! Its strange how our lives don’t go the way we planned!

  8. Michael on May 31, 2014 at 2:50 PM

    Beautiful post…love that Foxy! Long drives and existential questions…usually with The Bug asleep in the passenger’s seat…I know them well.

  9. Paul Parsons on May 31, 2014 at 4:08 PM

    How true! We choose some circumstances. But sometimes circumstances come and find us. And we have to decide whether to accept them, if they’re something we can’t change, or to work against them if we can change them. Just like Lee Ann Rimes sings about. . .

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