Terrible
The morning after
In an effort to distract myself from the early polls, last night I watched “Believe,” a 2013 documentary about Justin Bieber. Before you deem this an unpatriotic use of my time on the evening of an unprecedented election, remember that based on Trump’s non-existent qualifications, Bieber has a shot at being president someday too. Given…
The stuff of horror films
This time last year, I was seeing ants in my kitchen. I eventually discovered that they had raided my sugar bag, so I threw it out, and from that point on, I’ve kept my sugar in the freezer – and thus, an ant-free kitchen. But a few weeks ago, I saw an ant. And you…
The saddest day
I know. You have been nervously refreshing the page every moment since last Friday, awaiting an update as to the Honda’s fate. Well, people, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I’m alive. The bad news is that if oil were blood, my engine would be the beaches of Normandy….
Have I mentioned my state of physical woe?
Last Thursday morning, I was in a car accident. Don’t worry – the Honda’s fine – or, at least she will be after the other guy’s insurance pays for a new $750 bumper. Do you know what this means? I am losing my bumper stickers. All of them. No more “FRESH BEER.” No more “VIVA…
I AM ONE GIANT STRESS BALL.
I am flying to Nashville tonight, and am the world’s worst packer. No, really. War is to mankind as Annie is to packing. I ruin everything. I pack too little, or too much, or all the wrong shoes. Speaking of shoes, I bought a yellow dress to wear to Brook & Cara’s wedding this weekend,…
Annie Parsons: Ex-Con
Although I watched the opening ceremonies of the Olympics last week, I have yet to watch an actual Olympic. However, I must say that I’m liking Shaun White these days. I don’t know why – I never paid him any attention before. But isn’t he so likable? His big smile and happy heart? Don’t you…
Musicless
I am spoiled, and I am the first to admit it. Why, you ask? Well, among many other reasons, I have two identical black Macbooks – one personal, and one for work. Let’s be real: that is just ridiculous. More than anyone could ever ask for. But last week, my personal Macbook went kaput. It’s…