Never 21


On Saturday, I had an idea: “I should go to Forever 21!”  This always sounds like a good idea – cheap clothes, cute ruffles, trends that will go out of style tomorrow but you must have them today, etc.  However, upon my arrival at the front doors, I was reminded of the cold, hard truth – a truth that I already knew, since I have learned it many times before, but I always forget when I get swept up in the moment.

I HATE Forever 21.

It is my own personal hell.

First of all, is there any rhyme or reason to the way that the clothes are arranged?  It is impossible to find anything in that store.  Racks of magenta clubbing attire next to bins of mesh t-shirts beside half-clothed mannequins on top of tables piled high with plastic belted cardigans…  It’s like the cast of “High School Musical” set off a dirty bomb.

Secondly, the music is unbelievably obnoxious.  I can’t decide if it makes me want to curl into the fetal position or open fire.  Must shoppers be subjected to songs that include panting?  Panting?

And finally, do any of the clothes even fit me?   I mean, I know that technically, these items are made for pre-pubescent, hipless anorexics, but I have plenty of curvy lady friends who find treasures there.  I don’t expect that a Forever 21 medium will fit me like an Actual Normal Sized Woman medium might, so I have no problem looking at the larges, and even extra-larges.  But honestly?  Extra-extra-large?

That’s just rude.

I bought nothing.



  1. Angie on April 13, 2009 at 8:33 AM

    couldn’t agree more. I actually scoff when I compliment a friend’s shirt and they tell me it was from forever 21…knowing I’ll never find the treasure there.

  2. Emily on April 13, 2009 at 9:31 AM

    I feel the same way. It always SOUNDS like a good idea. And it is so colorful when you see it from the outside… but really, I can’t stand to be in the chaos of it for more than a few minutes.


  3. becca on April 13, 2009 at 10:05 AM

    i agree with the chaos. but anyhow, somehow, i ALWAYS end up spending a bajillion dollars at that store. always. i cannot resist the low prices. i find lots of things i like there.

  4. i dont think it’s possible to hate a place more. i imagine that if hell had a hell, it would be just like forever 21. i don’t think the extra-extra large would even fit my bicep.

    hm, i guess that’s the price i pay for being ridiculously buff.

    hah. right.

  5. Tad on April 13, 2009 at 2:34 PM

    You don’t need to shop there. You are a Woman, not a Girl. If you are an XXL, then EVERYONE ELSE is XXL too… unless you’re 10 years old.

  6. Jannell on April 13, 2009 at 3:54 PM

    You should move to Alaska where you can only shop online for Forever21. Far easier to swallow. Except the sizes. That is eternally stupid

  7. Sarah on April 13, 2009 at 5:18 PM

    Is this a Nashville thing?

    I hate Walmart. I walk out, feeling as though I’ve narrowly escaped Hell. It is a relief.

  8. dn on April 13, 2009 at 5:24 PM

    I’m nominating your “dirty bomb” comment for simile of the year.

  9. Anniebelle (Annie Cho) on April 13, 2009 at 9:40 PM

    Haha… I only end up buying earrings and necklaces there. H&M is soooooo much better! Too bad Nashville doesn’t have one… Yet.

    BTW, I think it high time we go for another Anthropologie outing, pretending we can afford (and fit, in my case) the clothes and bags and jewelry and other kitschy wonderfulness.

  10. kelli on April 16, 2009 at 7:07 PM

    I love your blog!! I am so happy to read that I am not the only one that hates that store! I too will walk in there thinking, “I’m going to find something”. Only to walk out feeling pissed off. Amen, amen to your blog, I love it!

  11. Michelle on April 21, 2009 at 3:48 AM

    This made me laugh outloud. It was like a really well played comedy routine where everyone in the audience laughs because the experience resounds with each person.

    And if I may add, you can’t even take back anything to Forever 21! You can only exchange it for store credit.


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