Food

The Colorado air is dry. This parched feeling is all-pervasive, making itself known in every part of my body.  My skin is the Sahara, my eyeballs, sandpaper.  I smile, and my bottom lip splits like the back of Chris Farley’s coat.  My hands are cracking, my cuticles flaking.  I cannot drink enough water. Short from…

I love beets.  I really, truly love them.  If I see them on a menu, I will choose beets over almost anything else. My least favorite color is blue.  I don’t hate it, I would just never pick it for anything.  If I were the captain of a kickball team, I would choose red first,…

Well, well.  You people sure love your grilled cheese. Thanks for all of the suggestions – I can’t wait to try them! Now… any chance you have ideas for oatmeal?  My requirements: not from a packet, low in sugar, tastes good.  Anyone? – – – – – – – – A quick update on the…

For as much as I love cheese – which, trust me, my devotion is infinite and everlasting – I rarely eat grilled cheese.  Chalk it up to just another childhood overdose – I never eat peanut butter & jelly, either.  Grilled cheese lost its appeal before Clinton took office. Which is why it was shocking…

The cruise ship is a battle zone, and I am at war. I refuse to gain a pound a day. But this is proving to take some serious combat. I wake up each morning and put on my armor: a reasonable breakfast of one egg over easy, a small bowl of cereal, and an Americano. …

Last night’s catfish and collard greens isn’t sitting so well.  Since when have I been an eater of collard greens?  Sheesh.  I don’t know.  It strikes me as odd that I would willingly order something that people would only eat if rummaging for food in the forest.  It’s practically chard. And yet, last night, it…

My friend Carly has a fabulous food blog aptly titled Fabulously Classic. She is my dream wife, coming up with all sorts of delicious concoctions to feed her husband Ben. Recently, she posted a recipe for pumpkin bars, and since it’s fall and I have A NEW MIXER, I thought I would bake a batch…

I was in the dairy section of the grocery store last night when a crisis hit me like a rake to the face. Reaching for my usual quart of Dannon Light & Fit vanilla yogurt, I noticed three terrible words: “Great New Taste!” What. Why do they need to go changing my favorite yogurt? I…

Chocolate: “I love you.” Peanut Butter: “I love you back.”

Be sure to check back later today for a very special surprise. I’m serious. But before your mind goes all haywire, know that the surprise is none of the following: 1) An engagement ring. 2) An ultrasound photo. 3) Anything related to “Lost.” I haven’t watched yet. DONOTTELLMEANYTHING!!!!! In the meantime, to sustain your minds…